Day 89: Where the Heck Is Me?



I haven’t been posting lately. It’s tough to write something meaningful, something worthy of  being read, everyday. I have also been struggling with expressing myself clearly. In this computer server sits many drafts I have written but never published. They were just crap, in my opinion.

My journal, however, is filled with thoughts and reflections, successes and failures written in a freer format. When I write for myself I feel completely unencumbered by the normal rules of writing, and write whatever is in my head. You, dear reader, are lucky I don’t share all those writings.

That doesn’t mean that Awesomeness has stopped. I have been living each day, all while loaded with single-parent responsibilities, personal goals, and work. The good news is that vacation is just 12 days away. The load on my shoulders will then become much lighter.

I am nearing the end of my first 100 days and feel, had I not embarked on this journey, I would not be doing as well as I am. I write a lot. I run 3 times a week. I’ve lost a lot of weight and have more energy than at any other time in the last 12 years. I practice, successfully and unsuccessfully, meditation often. I am reading more. The road was/is tough, but my goals have now become habits and routine. My life is better.

On the personal side, I am so proud of the work I have done. Closure, and letting go, is an amazing feeling.

I am already thinking and writing about my goals for the next 100 days. It’s becoming a list of things to do when I am unchained from my daily responsibilities. Old friends, family, relaxing, and trying new things are all on the list.  Writing, running, and mediation will continue!  I need to do them now.


So, as I prepare for a long vacation, I can’t help but think that the ultimate goal is to live each day, for the rest of my life, and turn this little project into a life of awesome.

I lived today. It was awesome. 



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